Current location:	MY MOMS FRIEND KAREN'S HOUSE
Current mood:	determined
Current music:	Gene Defcon, Wolfie

THERAPUTIC TYPING EXCERCISE
THIS HAS GOT TO BE SOME KIND OF CRUEL, TRYING TEST.

So, I got into the Make-up Designory...
A little bit later than originally planned, but I got in!
School starts March 10th, 2008.
EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, lets get back to the unadorned reality of my situation(!)
I spent so much time stressing over being accepted that I didn't
put much thought into how hard it would be for me to take out loans.
So far I've acquired $8,400 in federal grant money (which obviously rules), but for tuition and materials alone I need an additional $7,000. I'd love to have $5/6,000 extra to help pay for living expenses. This amount doesn't sound that far out of reach, until you take into account that I have:

a. bad credit (thanks alot credit cards!)
b. no solid work history for the past 3 years (thanks alot best fwends!)
c. no cosigner to help me take out a loan (thanks alot dad!)

I'm a loner, a rebel...on my own. Alone. Standing at the foot of a heavily cragged mega-mountain called "$13,000". I have 6 months to achieve this goal. I have no one to help me and no time to waste. Is this doable? We'll see. Attemptable? You better fucking believe it. I want this so bad that I'd do just about anything.

Unfortunately, money doesn't appear magically in my chimney everynight...
I got a job at a dollar store 2 blocks away from my mom's house,
which I will start within the next few days. God, I feel like I am so much better than this! A dollar store? $6.50 an hour... If I worked 50 hour weeks until school starts, I wouldn't make enough money to get into school. Which is why I'm picking up any and all odd/art related jobs I come across. CD/T-shirt/Flyer designs..bring em on.

I can't wait until the next European BF tour is behind me. It's such a shame when passions clash. I love playing/making music so much but ultimately it is messing up any hope at having a stable(?) future. I need to hurry up and quit the dollar store and start waiting tables or lifting heavy stones for large amounts of money.

So, for the next 6 months... I am going to be surfing the internet forwards and backwards looking for grant/loan opportunities (all suggestions MORE THAN WELCOME). I'm going to work my ass off at a "regular" job. I'm already contacting special effects studios and asking every question imaginable. I'm reading voraciously, running, doing push ups and sit ups (my dad made me a crazy but doable workout plan).

I am psyched on the future and I'm braving through the present.